So since moving to Gainesville around this time last year for Santa Fe College, I have learned a lot, not partied as much as a normal college student, but met a lot of awesome people and made some friends.

I got Russell. ♥



I worked at Copytalk, I worked at Starbucks, I quit Copytalk, and still suffer with the pressure of never having any money, and always wrinkling my forehead over bills and bugs and bus systems.

Kelsey and I are moving. Finally. To a house. Oh my. I'm really, super excited. Kelsey just seems kind of nonchalant about it, but she's so pissed off all the time (like Willow!) about Katie and the current living situation that she'd just about go anywhere offered.

Also since moving to Gainesville, there have been some additions to the family.

First is Willow:



He's about two years old. He's Kelsey's. And he's pissed.

Why? Well, I don't know, ask him. But he'll just hiss at you... sigh...

I've seen him crush mice and tear their guts out, rip tails off of lizards, and bring us a dead bird inside. What a sweet kitty.

Next is Aoife (ee-fuh):



She's very fat, but, no, she's not pregnant, and she doesn't have worms. Wouldn't you think that for a stray kitten? She's just fat. She's probably so cute, people just fed her.

Aoife likes to play with her fat on the balcony of our upstairs loft.



Then there is Black Kitty:



Today, I'm having to make the decision of whether to spade her or not. And she's pregnant. I don't think I'm going to do it, though it would be the smartest and least foolish thing to do.

She's actually Grandma's cat that I took in to get spade by Operation Catnip for her, then realized she was pregnant. And basically something very small escalated into this huge judgment of morality thing and it's just making me go kind of nuts lately.

And lastly there is Silvio:



He is sniffing the keyboard right now. He's about the size of my hand. Russell found him under Katie's car a couple nights ago, mewing and crying out, abandoned and skinny. He seems to be missing a couple claws, but other than that, he's fine. He's attacking my typing fingers. They probably look like two big, fleshy spiders dancing to him.

He really likes the breasts and buttocks of women. That is why he is Silvio Berlusconi.

Oh, and Russell's autistic kitty, Lope Pene:



So we are moving in July. And then Kelsey and I are going with Denisha, from French Club, and Alexis, Denisha's friend as well as Josh's, from work, sister, to Atlanta, Georgia for Twitour, which is sooo awesome! (And sooo expensive!) And then right after we do that the entire weekend, Harry Potter comes out, AHHH, and I'm so showing my Ravenclaw pride. And then school starts. And July will just be crazy.

My roommate and I live directly on NW 34th and W Uni, which is a relatively nice neighborhood, but we have to move. We like this place on NW 13th Terrace, basically off of NW 5th Ave, which is off of NW 13th St. So right off 13th, and very close to Krispy Kreme ;)

Anywhere, we're wondering about the neighborhood there, and how it is. Let us know anything you can.

Thanks! ♥

Joa

been a long time.

Christmas break is about relaxing, right? But even laying down is not relaxing. All I can think about is all the stuff that I have to do.

But spending time with you makes me feel better. It saddens and frustrates me that you don't feel the same.

I jolted awake at six this morning to the sound of the phone ringing right next to my ear after I had gotten off of it just a few hours before, having been speaking to the same person who gave me this lovely wake-up call. Debbie came bursting in, "Where's the phone?" "It's Ricky..." "Ugh!" and stormed back out. Ricky told me to get ready in half an hour and I laid in bed for awhile. My dad came out into the living room (everyone can pretty much hear everything that goes on here in this house, and it is especially helpful that each door has its own distinct squeaking noise) and Debbie told him about how she was woken up by the telephone (though I seem to remember that she was on the computer at the time? So did it really matter?). This is why I don't like Ricky giving me wake-up calls...but I don't want to risk falling back asleep.

Ricky and his mom came over at around seven and we went to Wal-Mart. I don't think Debbie knew this was why Ricky was calling...so I understand her aggravation at being awoken by a senseless phone call, though I am not so sure that it did wake her, but whatever. Debbie doesn't sleep.

While Ricky's mom, who I will call Cindy from now on, shopped and seemingly disappeared for forty-five minutes, Ricky and I McDonalded it up. I ended up accidentally throwing away Cindy's credit card. I had run across the store and dig it out later. We had a good laugh about what people must have been thinking of this poor girl having to salvage from garbage bins. Cindy bought me a bunch of yarn, initially to be for Christmas, but now as payment for sealing their tile floor in their entire house (I get paid $5/hr for this, I have only made $10 so far when sealing the tiny utility room. After Ricky's dad and I had made this deal, I was soon after grounded for sneaking out with Ricky at two in the morning that Saturday, so I haven't really been able to live up to that job), so I love her.

My back left molar that chipped in October 2007 from eating a banana chip came out today. The filling did, anyway. It cracked again earlier this month, and then it became progressively more wiggly until finally today in Wal-Mart, I was messing with it (as I often do), and it came out. It satisfied me that it came out, but it greatly depressed me too and before I knew it I was crying. I have such fucking shitty teeth. Anyway, so now I have a hole in my mouth that food gets stuck in. At least I can clean properly in and around there now though. And the tooth was just ceramic. I need a root canal there anyway, also for the tooth directly opposite, on the right side of my mouth. Hopefully that one won't decide to drop out of my mouth anytime soon.

On the way home, we talked about things. Cindy told the story of her young pregnancy to me (and Ricky, since he was in the car), something that apparently Ricky hadn't even heard before. She had been asking me about my tooth, concerned about my well-being in that way that makes me feel special. I explained to her the situation of going to the University of Florida Student Dental Clinic to get the root canals done for half of the normal price, but also that $400 is still a lot of money, and I need $800. It is $90 alone for the appointment. I figure I will just get it done under my parents' insurance when I am in college, or when I have my own job. Perhaps they can help out, but I don't just want to be like my other sisters...asking for hundreds of dollars all the time, saying they will pay it back, and then not even talking to him.

When I got home today, I went outside to the back yard where my dad was watching his fire of stray tree branches and we talked. I told him that I was pretty sure that my sisters were just ashamed. Ashamed of what they had done, ashamed of what they had doing. I hate it though, because he doesn't seem to understand a word that I say. Ever. Of course, he normally has a Busch in one hand that he can't put down. He almost cried a bit. My sisters are being so fucking stupid. And my dad thinks I am just like them, with kudos to Debbie. What the fuck do they want me to do? I can't prove them wrong if they have the belief so ingrained in their minds that I am just like my sisters. And it is just so wrong how they don't think of young people as people at all. They don't have problems, at least not serious ones. They are always in the wrong. People under forty do not know anything. "But they think they know everything." They stand there and insult all young people everywhere based upon all the stupid things anyone has ever done (not just young people) right in front of me. I am just a stereotype. I am just a fuck-up. They want better for me, they say, but then they say that it is hopeless for me to be anything but a silly teenager. It is really, really degrading. I don't even feel like a human being. I used to not anyway. I used to, in that moment, only feel the overwhelming need to please them in every way so that they would finally see me in a good light. But not anymore. I just get annoyed. Because they are so ignorant.

And, I don't want to be stupid here. They probably do see me in some amount of good light. I mean, I hope they do. Because it is just so hard to believe that they think I am some horrible spawn of Satan when I haven't done anything. They just see everything on the news and in movies and what my sisters do and transfer it onto me. This is the Average Teenage Daughter. This is What She Thinks, this is What She Does. And because of this preset image they have, they can't ever know who I am.

Done with that.

I am glad I feel good today. I mean, I feel like shit because of my tooth, and my throat is itchy, but I am not nauseas today as I was last night. Part of Ricky's and my conversation included me feeling as if I were going to vomit. Our minds jumped to the scary idea of pregnancy. You are supposed to use extra contraception during the first week of taking the birth control pill (I am taking Reclipsen), and on like the fourth day, we did not.

Sewing makes me sew happy.

Haha, I made a funny!

But seriously, I feel very accomplished. When you can make something with your hands...it is amazing how good you feel about it. Something useful, that someone else likes, that many people like and want you to make them one. Actually, that part gets annoying. I mean, it is flattering and everything...but they just want to use me as their little working elf so that they can have something to show off their body in. Like Camilla, she was genuinely so happy that I had spent my time making her something, something that was very her, something that was tailored to fit her. And then everyone just assumed that I would make them shit too. And I probably will, but it irked me right then to think about it because they just want themselves some of that DIY fashion, they don't care about me or my time or my shirts that I am cutting up for them. All take, no give. But I don't care. As long as I have you, Livejournal, to complain about it to, I can handle selfish people. I like it when they like me. It makes me feel like I am worth something. However, you know, I started sewing so that I could make myself some kick-arse clothes...and I have yet to make myself anything!

My stomach is being all icky. This possibly may have something to do with the fact that most of what I have consumed today has been chocolate.

Couldn't go to Sweeney Todd with Kelsey because her mom was being "bah humbug" about the world. Perhaps I shall see it someday. Along with I Am Legend and Juno, please.

Tomorrow morning, at around six or seven, Ricky and his mom are going to be going to Wal-Mart. They do that sometimes, go really early in the morning to beat the noon and afternoon and evening rushes. They are bringing me this time too. Yay!

I think I might be baby-sitting too. I baby-sat Tuesday...Mrs. Carney (my old Psychology teacher, as well as Ricky's half-sister) called me in Mrs. Hiers's room (the art room) to tell me to turn in my research paper to Mrs. Spradley (because the woman was calling her about it, what the fuck?) and that she might need me to baby-sit tomorrow morning. Woo, $30!

I changed the layout, isn't it gorgeous? Thank you to tillyness!

So I just started up a bunch of crochet trades. I updated my site, too. I posted a wishlist on _wantlists. But now I am tired and I am going to bed. I really need to find my cellphone. It makes me so sad to be without it. I can't take any pictures! Life is bland. Food has lost its taste. Woe is me without my cellphone that I never cared about before, but after I found out that I could take pictures with it and upload them to the Internet, I fell in love. In deep, deep love. And now our lives have split, we are heading down two different paths, and I fear that we shall never meet again! I yearn for you, cellphone. Please come back to me. I swear I can change. Just tell me what you want me to do!

Sigh.

My room is in such a very dirty state. I try not to look at it, but it is hard because I am in it almost all the time, like right now I am in it. Luckily, I can distract myself from the filth by concentrating on the screen.

So my dad's watching The Bourne Ultimatum right now. We watched it last night, but he was asleep on and off. It is amazing. I really would like to read the books now. The ending made me smile. I wonder if it is true to the books? Whether it is or not, it's a great story. There are slight points where it's kind of silly and they make you remember that it is a movie, but all in all, it sucks you in like crazy, or me anyway.

Angel will be getting home today from that place near Vero Beach, her family reunion thing. I hope Dominic went with her. I have not called because I am stupid. In fact, I am going to do that after I posted this. After all, I was supposed to go with her. But I fucked everything up by sneaking out last Saturday night. It was not for that long, and we (Ricky and I) did not do anything bad...besides sneak out. We went to Rum Island springs, down my road, and laid on a blanket under the stars (ooo, how romantic). Then we went to a convenient store in High Springs (Skittles, chocolate milk, and a peanut butter chip cookie) and parked in the Civic center parking lot, where a policeman saw us and thought we looked suspicious enough to check out. He was "obligated" to call our parents. Ricky drove himself home and the policeman drove me home. My dad did not trust me before, now he still does not, but at least now he has grounds to say it.

Luckily, he let me go with Ricky to Christmas shopping at the mall on Saturday. There was all this shit with Mandee freaking out. She is insane! And I do not think that I can change the way she is, or make her see reason. I commented her space, telling her what ACTUALLY happened, but she did not approve it. At the mall, Ricky and I were supposed to meet up with his friend Kristen, but she could not make it. We ran into Shawn and his mom and Camilla and Scaputo instead, the last two who instantly concurred with me on the matter of Mandee being crazy. However, they were being kind of like her...jumping at the chance to insult people. I am not holding anything against Mandee. Or Justin. Who was worse. (I think he THINKS that he was being chivalrous? But all he was doing was being a jerk-off.) I despair for ignorant people and all of their moronicness that they simply do not know how to suppress.

Car chase in The Bourne Ultimatum! Excitement!

Alright, so this semester is almost over. Fucking crazy fucking shit. While I am VERY excited to be out on my own (as I have been for AGES), this is MADNESS. I am halfway done with senior year! How did that happen? I have been with Ricky for over TWO years. We have both changed so much. I would say for the better.

I still do not know what I am going to major in, but at least I know that I am going to Santa Fe Community College. I still do not know who I am going to live with, but at least I know that I have friends and potential roommates in Ricky and Angel and Kelsey and many other people, but mostly those first three. I still do not have my license or a car. I still have not submitted that dental application, and my teeth are shit. I still have not taken the ACT (next chance is registering in January for the February test, which is what I am going to do). I still have not applied to SFCC (I was going to after I took the ACT...but do I really need to wait? They do not really have high standards. The only reason I am taking the ACT after I have already taken the SAT is because I want the Florida Bright Futures 100% scholarship--but I already qualify for the 75%, which, if I go to a community college for the first two years, makes it a 100%...but I am not sure if I am going to stay at SFCC for a full two years).

Many decisions need to be made. Right now I am going to focusing on cleaning my room, washing the dishes, and decorating our Christmas tree though. I need to finish my online Economics class and get out of Mrs. Spradley's English IV class that I should not even be in. I love the people in there, but not enough to go through with this silly Senior Project stuff. I took Freshman Comp I and II last year to EVADE all this, for Christ's sake!

Alright, toodles! ♥

So yesterday marked the day of the last day of my school's six weeks. That's the second six weeks already over. There are only six in a school year. High school time is slipping away from me, and I'm not sure what to think about it. It's BEEN slipping away from me, ever since it started, and even then it seemed to be going by fast (contrary to popular belief). I really can't believe it. I still remember being in the 7th grade and crap, so this is pretty much madness. How did I get here? With Ricky? With Angel? With Kelsey? With Maria? With Lindsay? All these people that I now have a relationship with, some who I did before, but definitely a LOT different than they are now. I'm not totally sure that that is grammatically correct.

Anyway, I'm really getting artsy lately. I'm doing rather bummy in my AP Art class, because it is very hard to keep track of the class if you are not actually in it. Since my French class clashes with my AP Art class, I am forced to just do the AP Art work in a regular Art Comp III class, which isn't so great. It's a totally different atmosphere, one that is hardly comfortable enough to me for me to be working on AP work...but work I must, at least until next semester. I'm thinking of dropping out of French II and taking the second semester of that online while switching into the real AP Art class. That would just be wonderful. Though I would miss Monsieur Abou. He is so kind. He is just not a good teacher, and he does not have confidence or whatever it takes to babysit us teenagers.

So I just finished This Lullaby by Sarah Dessen. I had been avoiding her books for the longest time, while reading other names such as Maureen Johnson, John Green, and Scott Westerfeld religiously. Her books just looked so cliche. Like Meg Cabot books, though I love Meg Cabot books, so I don't really know what I'm talking about. I think it's Maria that has done me in. I'm constantly going all judgmental on MYSELF thinking I'm being so juvenile, reading these YA books, when I could be reading REAL fiction...but what the fuck kind of logic is that? This Lullaby was good. It wasn't so much the story that was good, but the interaction between the characters, and the characters and their flaws, which I grow from just reading about.

Now I'm reading Twilight, very slowly. I'm very excited. I want to see the movie. But I don't even think it's in the making yet...?

Good things have happened since I last updated! Angel is living with her parents. Wait, that's not a good thing is it? She feels like she's backtracked on life, back to where she was before, but really, she's come so far. Just like...herself, not her accomplishments. She's changed and so have I, and, honestly, for the best, though it may seem otherwise from an outsider's point-of-view.

This Friday, Angel has to work, but her and Kelsey and Ricky and TJ and I are planning on going to Midnight Madness at the Columbia County Fair. Woot! It will be COLD! I get shivers just thinking about it. Then again, I only know the cold of Florida. I don't have an aversion to it though. I love fall, I love winter, I love spring, I love summer. Er, I meant to say that I loved winter...but apparently I love everything...but seriously, I enjoy the cold, and I hate sweating...so, actually, if you think about it, this time of year is the worst! You wake up and it's FREEZING, so you don a long-sleeved shirt and a hoodie, and then by afternoon, you are sweating like a pig, even after you've tied the hoodie around your hips and pulled up your sleeves to your elbows. It's frustrating! This is why we need lockers, people, just another reason!

ANYway, Kelsey and I will go from school to my place. Ricky will go to pick up TJ from Santa Fe High School and they will go to his place. Angel will go to her place and go to work until around 8pm. Then Ricky and TJ will come to pick up Kelsey and I and we will go hang out at Angel's. Hopefully we can take a walk around her block, which is always nice, but TJ's only really Ricky's friend, so it might be weird, though he's very cool and nice and outgoing. And I am also hoping that Ricky will loosen up and bring Guitar Hero III over. And then $10, 10pm to 2am, is Midnight Madness! My family is leaving for my Grandma Donna's (a 2-hour drive) from my house at 6am, so I gotta be home by then, before then preferably. Ricky and I are thinking of stashing up on Upshots, these tiny energy drinks in little glass bottles that we saw at the convenience store. I am not for caffeine drinks usually, but this seems like it would help and be fun at the same time. Especially if we get it in our systems for the walk, LOL. Imagine.

I'm back on Myspace, by the way. http://myspace.com/frozenboogereatr

Now thoughts of Guitar Hero III are making me leave you!

Good night! ♥

I ASKED my dad if I could give Baby a bath and he said no.

After reading the course resources, answer questions 1-10. (10 points each)
Please take time to answer each question completely.

1.Think of a person who has positively influenced your life or for whom you have great admiration. Write down the characteristics that person has/had that you would like to develop.

My friend's mother, Shelly, is an amazing inspiration to me. I often find myself with good intentions but then sitting around and doing nothing because I'm scared or lazy or doubtful. She gets my butt in gear when I fail to do it myself by reminding me that good things can't come unless your strive for them, and that complaining about and wishing for things won't get you very far. She's ambitious and gets what she wants done and doesn't wait around for the world to do it for her.

2.Imagine 15 years from now being surrounded by the most important people in your life. Who are these people and what are they doing?

Ricky and Kelsey and Angel are my three very best friends. I foresee Ricky being a criminal psychologist like Huang from Law and Order: Special Victims Unit. He will be amazing and renowned, he will love his work and learn from it everyday, and come home to me and kiss me on the forehead. Kelsey is writing best-selling novels that are about insane topics that no other writer has ever dared to touch, but she doesn't very well and leaves her reader's with life-changing things to think about. Angel has dumped Derek or kicked Derek into gear. She has replaced her low self-esteem with utter confidence, which she achieves with the help of knowing that she is unconditionally loved by her friends and her brother, Ray. She sells real estate honestly and all of her customers are left very happy. We all take a month-long travel-the-world vacation once a year.

3.Think about what deeply inspires you and write about this inspiration.

Internally, books always inspire me. Once I have finished reading a good book, or even as I am in the midst of reading it, I always feel that I have learned something and that the world isn't so bad and all that good stuff. Other than reading material, advances in science always seem to inspire me. Not quite sure why, except that perhaps because it shows that we as people can get somewhere, for the good and not just because to make money but to further each other.

4.List 10 things you love to do.

I love to write, I love to read, I love to watch movies, I love to listen to music, I love to play outside, I love to sleep, I love to do math, I love to hug, I love to swim, I love to dance.

5.If you could study anything you wanted, what would you study?

Fine arts, it would be awesome.

6.You are facing a tremendously dangerous situation. You have the choice to take the risk or not take this risk. What would motivate you to take this risk?

If I knew that someone would get some good out of it no matter how the situation turned out.

7.If you could spend 1 day with anyone who has ever lived, whom would you spend it with, why, and what would you ask this person?

I always see this question and have no idea how to answer it. I wouldn't really care to meet a famous person who, though I may admire, I don't know and they don't know me so it would mostly just be awkward for me and run-of-the-mill for them. I suppose I would like to spend a day with Queen Ranavalona though and convince her to not be evil.

8.If you could choose an animal or symbol to represent you, what would it be and why?

A dog. I'm loyal, friendly, quick at learning, impressionable, and kind of gross sometimes.

9.Choose two of your favorite quotes or verses and write them here. (“Sticks and stones may hurt my bones, but words can hurt the heart.” Author unknown)

"All the best heroes are ordinary people who make themselves extraordinary" ~ Gerard Way

"We have, I fear, confused power with greatness." ~ Stewart L. Udall

10.Using the information above, write your mission statement. It can take many forms: a song, picture (explain the picture), theme, or collage. Make it uniquely you. A mission statement should be short enough to commit to memory but contain those points that are important to you. (10 points)

Joy, true joy, can
Only be
Achieved by
Never ignoring your heart's
Nagging when it is
Attempting to point you in the right direction

"[In this lesson] find out:

* just how friendly the Native Americans were with the settlers.
* which Native American learned English and traveled to London.
* who was the father of Pocahontas.
* about Powhatan's marrying habits!"

Why the fuck am I learning about this in my English class?

My minty, minty mouth has been thoroughly cleaned by waxed floss, a fraying toothbrush, and non-alcoholic mouthwash. I should do that every night...but I don't. I could feel the plaque on my teeth though, and it was disconcerting.

I need to make a lot of stuff by Monday to send out. I should not be on the Internet...but I am. I want to start selling things again once I'm caught up on all my past orders so that I can buy a new camera.

Oh my, Lindsay's so nice. She kept thanking me for inviting her to go to the movies (even though I've postponed the date twice). She has a deep voice, like a sarcastic one, not that she's sarcastic. When she says thank you, it's so sincere, like a you-are-the-coolest-person-in-the-world thank you. Haha, I think I am starting to sound creepy.

I am proud of myself for doing a bunch of LMS classes this week, but I still have a few to go until I am caught up to this week, which is ending at midnight on Sunday, and once again I will be two weeks behind. Jesus fucking Christ.

Yay, school started! Sort of strange to be back, but pretty awesome at the same time. Maria is tagging along again and being relatively nice (as nice as Maria can be) and it's pretty annoying but it doesn't seem right to say anything. She's got no one else to hang with and that's why she hangs with me. I don't know what to say either. The only thing that would really do anything would be to totally dis her and tell her to leave for good or something, but I would have to be some sort of cruel and heartless person to do that.

Fucking Guidance has screwed up my senior year royally by making it impossible for me to take Physics, Philosophy, or World History, all AP (almost Art AP as well, but Hiers as agreed that I can call myself an AP person and just be in the art room at the designated Art Comp III time). However, I do love my English class, complete with Kelsey and Ricky and Stephanie and Shawn. Hopefully I'll have Drama in 4th block and I can volunteer at the library in 5th block (though Stephanie wants me to stay in PE...but if I don't need it, I don't really want to stay; so far it has been fun with her and Sevryn and Shawn, but Sevryn is leaving soon and all we have been doing is playing cards, which gets boring pretty quick). My French class is looking up this year because there are two new girls in it. One is not very nice, but the other is, and they are both good at French (like that actually learned something in their French I and retained it--amazing :-o!).

This weekend we are painting my grandma's house and apparently I have to go...but my dad said that it shouldn't take all day and it is possible that it we will be rained out. I DO want to help my grandma, but I still hope that one of the latter predictions of my father are true, so that I can also go to the movies with Kelsey and Joie and Stephanie and Sevryn and Lindsey or Lindsay (the new girl in my French class...she's very pretty and Michael Myers is already all over her, as Ricky put it, as he was with Stephanie when she was new). Of course, I don't know if all of these people are actually going, but apparently Stephanie and Joie want to see Superbad super-badly and Kelsey and I just love movies in general (and the fact that there is a glassed, black-haired boy with a "Mclovin" pseudonym is enough to make me be obsessed with the idea of this movie).

The funny thing is, I never really talked to any of these people. I mean, Kelsey has always been my friend, but I never paid much attention to her 'cause I'm a stupid-head and now that I am I am very happy and wishing that I had spent every waking moment with her before. I always disliked Joie because she's a not-so-nice person. She still is, but I've gotten over the way people are and have decided to just let them be and still get along with them. Joie can be very agreeable. And Sevryn I had in my Anatomy class all last year, but that's all that I ever saw her. She's still just mostly my giggling, Gaia-companion, cutesy person, but that's cool. And I always felt that Stephanie was too cool for me...and she still is, it just so happens that I have her in a couple of classes so she's forced to hang out with me.

I have decided that I want to dye my hair and that I want snake bites (just two simple sterling silver ones). However, the latter probably won't happen until I'm 18 or until I graduate and if I still want them then. At first, I didn't like them, but I gradually became obsessed over the time period of 24 hours. I have no idea what happened. I just woke up and knew that I desired snake bites. Ricky and I, at one point, had made a deal to both get eyebrow rings, on different eyebrows, for our anniversary (which is sometime in mid-late October, he thinks the 21st?), but I don't think my parents would have allowed that and he kind of chickened out (like, it was a nice thing to think about, but to actually THINK about it happening was a scary thought).

Anyway, I haven't drawn anything on my tablet in awhile. I keep thinking about doing it and then I'm like, "No! I must do LMS FLVS!" and then I end up doing neither. The story of my life! I have Calculus homework. I feel so smart and cool carrying around my Calculus book (that's half why I carry it in my hands and not in my bag, the other half being that it would tear my bag apart because it is one gigantic book of text). I wish I could pair it up with Physics...I need to go see Mr. Lassiter and let him know that I love him, but that guidance (which is interchangeable with fate) just doesn't want to see us together. Alas, I will miss him.

I haven't seen Fergus much, but I did give him a stuffie with unmatching appendages on the first day of school, which he seemed to appreciate. I guess I forgot to mention to him that his name was Newton (knighted by Ricky's father) because when I asked him how Newton was, he looked at me all funny.

Alrighty then! I half-forced myself to start writing in here because it's been awhile and I was tired of seeing that silly RP that I pasted into here (which was mostly on amusing if you were there at the time, because then you could truly grasp how utterly random it was), but when I started writing I just seemed to have a lot more to say than I had to. Or it looks like more, all typed out and such.

I think I caught my dad about to do weed today, but I can't be sure. I kind of just want to tell him it's okay, because I know he must be living with it and feeling all guilty and bad but not wanting to stop, kind of like drinking and smoking. Well, maybe not smoking, but definitely drinking...at points. I have dropped, "You should stop smoking, Daddy," twice or thrice, but I suppose I should be doing something else. I mean, I KNOW I want him to stop because I don't want him to die and Mr. Lassiter said that he finally got his parents to quit but it was too late and they developed lung cancer and I want my dad to see any babies I might have ;-;...

On Gaia, since the forums are so huge, your thread will never stay at the top of the list of threads, so people "bump," or post in the thread, to move it to the top. I commissioned some avatar art from this girl and, as a favour, started bumping her thread (also because I was bored). So as I bumped, this is what commenced:

Not Butter: hey who let this frozen booger eater in here haha did you all know that a booger hanging from your nose is called a gilbert, lol urban dictionary

Frozenboogereatr: What-what? You shan't mock me!

The King 2o1: AHH IM SOOOO HUNGRY!!!!! Feed me your babys.

Frozenboogereatr: Ditto. SO hungry. I had a piece of bread today D: This is a horrible thing to ask! You didn't even spell babies right. Ninja infants, COMMENCE ATTACK.

Not Butter: *spreads butter all over the ground tripping all of the ninja action bebehs*

Frozenboogereatr: "What is this?!" shouted Joa, her salmon pink hair waving in the wind and causing her to look incredibly possessed.

She watched in horror as the members of her baby zombie army of ninjas ran towards the king, screaming out battle cries, only to reach the large slab of butter that Not Butter had laid out before them in an instant. Before any of the helpless infants could realise the consequences, they charged through the glistening spread of lard. One by one they fell, their little feet slipping from under them, betraying their need for vengeance.

Frozenboogereatr: "NO!" she bellowed, raising her raggedy leather sketchbook high above her head as she charged toward Not Butter. The black-suited man had begun to walk away, dusting his hands as he did.

She dived towards the back of his knees, catching him by awful surprise as he slammed to the floor, headfirst. She crawled on top of his backside and sat down on it, propping her booted foot on his head. The side of his face dug into the ground, its features contorted with the pressure. Joa leaned forward, resting her elbow on her red and white striped knee. A smirk spread her face and they eyebrows above her wild eyes rose.

"Think you can mess with my ninja babies, Not?" Joa whispered tauntingly. "Think again."

Not Butter: this is amazing, I will [post] when i get back, hope no one posts

Not Butter: In dire emotional pain, due to being handled by a woman in the wrong way, much like how his mother would react after eating all of the butter, Not Butter's muscles doubled in size reaching the physique of his favorite tekken star, Heihachi Mishima. His large muscular body tore his clothes of which were instantly replaced with a pair of black and yellow boxing shorts and gloves. "Hahahahahaaaa" Not Butter chuckled to himself throwing Miss Boogey off of his back and into a boxing ring down in the great state of boxitopia. Hopping into the ring he buttered himself up and grabbed the girl by the shoulders lifting her up to a battle pose. He walked to his corner of the ring, and the bell rung and he was ready to box her out.

: *DING!*

Joa jumped at the sound of the bell. Goosebumps traveled up her arms, the tiny hairs refusing to lay back down. She had never boxed before in her life and for one maddening second thought it might be best to make a run for it, but then she thought of her ninja babies. She looked over her shoulder at the mass of little bodies strewn across Not Butter's disgusting idea of a joke.

But it's not game time anymore, Joa thought to herself.

She shook her head to clear her mind. Not Butter had been staring intently at her from across the ring as she had pondering her situation so foolishly, as if waiting for her to take the first move. Seeing that she wasn't about to, her enemy slowly crept forward.

After throwing her detective kit and sketchbook over the ring's ropes to the ground below, Joa licked her lips.

Still, this could get real fun, she murmured.

Not Butter: Having the subtle feeling that his opponent was ready Butter charged at her with furious fist after fist after fist. Although he was attacking far more than she, he started to realize he wasn't doing any damage because his gloves were too damn buttery. He decided to wash them off with a rag. Booger was not going to just let him do as he wished and she attacked him fist after fist after fist he dodged every punch and after an hour his gloves finally were butter free (pokemon pun, lol) and he layed her out in one single punch to the nose sending a billion frozen boogers out of her nose and onto the audience.

"Not so tough are ya?"

invie`: [This is her art commission thread.] D: AN RP?


whoa.
D:

THIS IS INTENSE.

Frozenboogereatr: Joa scowled at Not Butter's mocking remark, wiping her nose and her mouth off on the sleeve of her black coat. Slowly, she rose from the ground to look at her opponent again. He was untouched, and grease still covered his entire surface save his gloves. She felt that the match had already slipped through her fingers, similar to the way any of her punches that did manage to collide with Not Butter seemed to slide off and do no damage. It was time for her Secret Weapon.

Joa took a step to her right, and continued as Not Butter did the same. They continued circling each other, never breaking their intense, challenging gaze. The circle closed in, becoming smaller and smaller with each lap the two made around the ring. It had almost taken up an aura, slowly piercing the closed eyes of the scattered infants and awakening them from their slumber. As they awoke, one by one they each realised vaguely what had happened and began to cry. Together they made a sort of chorus that the two fighters perceived as cause for action, and the both lunged at each other first.

Not Butter made for another one of his brutal uppercuts only too soon, and Joa took this opportunity to put her Secret Weapon to action. Just as his fist was barely a foot from knocking her clean off her feet again, she leaned to the side in one swift motion, bending in such a way that possibly no contortist would even attempt. As predicted, Not Butter stumbled forward to his knees after not having dispensed the force of his punch on his opponent.

It was at this moment that Joa cried, "Booger Fury: FORCE OF THE MUCUS!"

Immediately, the babies ceased their crying and jumped up into an identical, rigid stance. Not Butter had began to rise, shaking his head and looking, for lack of another word, pissed. Seeing that she didn't have much time, Joa quickly pressed her right finger to the respective nostril and blew.

She blew and blew and streams of oozing, olive-coloured slime flew out. Together as one force, the babies caught and surrounded the mucus, forming it into a large ball and hoisting it above their heads, as if it were crowd surfing. And all at once, their little arms bent and pushed up, launching the ball into the air, aimed straight for Not Booger.

`Magiek: *skims page* xDDD lmao

Not Butter: Feeling the shame of just the thought of what could happen if he was seen being destroyed by a girl who needs a tissue and her rare ninja babies who were about to hurl a ball of Gilberts at him. At this point he had two options: A. Dodge the ball of slimy dirt and make a comeback by using his special technique or B. Take the blow and stuff.....? Although he had decided to act on option A he thought for a whopping ten minutes while the mucus ball sipped some tea, but the wait was too long and the ball engulfed NB in it's slimy goop of pain. After his life flashed before his eyes he decided to stand and mix the snot with arms faster than any bullet.

"Do you think I didn't learn anything from eating all that butter, HUH!!! I CAN TURN ANYTHING INTO BUTTTTEEERRRRRRRR AHHHHHHHHHHHAAAAAAAHHHHHH!!!!!!!!"

His arms were moving so fast that a buttery orb of lard covered him from any attacks. In seconds he did what it takes seemingly hours to do and the impossible all in one. He turned snot into butter in a matter of seconds, OMG!!! In a flash Not Butter took the buttery ball that was once snot and jumped so fast into the back of JOA and hurled the ball back at her and only moments after the orb of butter that surrounded him was now surrounding her from the inside. Thinking he was all that he peered over at the babies with the most furious of faces and being the sly fellow that he is instantly handed them all a loli-pop.

"Hahahaa, should give me enough time to sew my PJ's back together."

Frozenboogereatr: Only a few strands of her salmon pink hair could be seen of Joa. She lay flat on her stomach with the giant glob of butter keeping her down. It was incredibly suffocating, and she knew that she had to find a way out, and quick. However, her thoughts were becoming misty with every second that she lacked air and soon the only action that Joa could think of to make was to get out by manual labour. Clawing her way from the inside out of the mound of grease, she finally broke free, but once she had, she simply slid back down, feeling utterly defeated. What a fool she had made of herself, of her ninja babies. They would all head home from this Boxitopia, covered in Not Butter's filth, showing their shame. She could hardly bear it.

Snapping herself from her depressive thoughts, Joa whipped her head around to take in the scene of Not Butter handing out sweeties to her minions.

"How dare you!" she spat, now attempting with all her might to scramble up out of the muck. She could still see little traces of green in it here and there. Maybe this Not Butter wasn't as great as he thought he was, or at least how she had thought he was.

"You h-horrid lump of d-dimwitted grease!" Joa spluttered, still slipping and sliding amongst the buttery pool she was in.

She eventually made it to the edge, but only by the time that every ninja baby except for one had taken Not Butter's surely conspiratorial gift delightedly.

Apparently I did not leave my toothbrush at Kelsey's, because I just found it the other night.

My mom called today asking about my teeth problems that Jessica told her about, I guess. And I should be getting snacks and money for my birthday from Jessica, who I need to call back, woo!

My dad can't keep a secret, to the possible frustration of Debbie, or at least he couldn't last night because he showed me my AWESOMEAWESOMEAWESOME birthday present. Oh my.

I got a tablet. A tablet! Finding out that they were very expensive, I told daddy last night nevermind about the tablet. And he's like, "Like the one sitting on the bed?" Haha, so that is how I found out. Or rather, Ricky found out first, and then he wouldn't tell me, so I had to find out for myself. Sure enough, SUPER-DUPER WACOM TABLET MODEL PTZ-NUMBERNUMBERNUMBERNUMBER. Prepare yourself for total Jo-artist domination. Yay! Maybe I can get good at digital colouring now. And I can make awesome artworks that will impress Mr. Fergus and when he comes across them randomly one day on the Internet, he will save the images to his computer and forget the artist's name, and then I will one day browse those pictures and find my artwork. I will point at it and say, "Alas, Fergus! It is but my work!" And he retort, "But do not be so sure of yourself: that is a fine artist of incredible talent and experience, something that you cannot have possibly yet attained in your young age." And then I will show him my tablet and he will understand. This plan, however, is not at all realistic because my dad already said that the tablet does not go to school (but how will he learn?).

Anyway, so I'm two weeks behind in LMS...or I was...and now I'm not. Now I'm one week behind, and tomorrow I will be no weeks behind and the next time I will be one week ahead. Huzzah! Hopefully the same goes for my other classes. I just got activated in that SAT Preparation class today (finally!). And I went to Scholarships.com, which may or may not be dependable (but it did seem like a professional sort of database) and put in a lot about myself and came up with 80+ scholarships that could possibly apply to me. Well, actually, I would have to apply to them, but you get the general idea: those 80+ scholarships and I, we were MADE for each other.

Baby has been in the house most of the day and he is looking quite cute. Ricky says he looks very bored, which I can only agree with because all I ever see him do is sleep. But I think he enjoys sleeping.

My iPod shuffle, which has been doomed to uselessness for about four or five months, is finally (I think) in working order! I kept putting off calling in about the warranty because I would remember but then say I would do it later, but then I would forget, and afterward the process would repeat. Alas, I do not need to cal in about the warranty! I did this reinstalling bit after restarting and restoring didn't work (I'm sure Apple TRIES not to be confusing...).

Anyway, I need to send out many things tomorrow, such as the Panda Bear Swap (late), the second sending of the Secret Craftster Swap (on time, but my first package was way late), the Wacom software bundle DVD which I am swapping for a CD, Stuffie swap (on time if I manage to send out tomorrow), and other things that I don't wish to think about because those are late and unfinished projects.

I think I'm just going to go back to Gaia, er, I mean, LMS...yeah...

I left my toothbrush at Kelsey's and I haven't brushed my teeth in a couple of days. And I just woke up. UGH.

I started an art thread on Gaia, which is probably why I was glued to Gaia for HOURS last night until this morning, when I went to sleep, woke up, and got straight back on. It's not going as well as I would like it to, because I am even offering free paintings and no one is asking Dx...I guess I should put it in the subject line.

I have finished Deathly Hallows. And since I have not actually used the "Reading Deathly Hallows" icon yet, I will use it now, when it is most irrelevant. I enjoyed it very much, and anyone who says it is boring is dimwitted.

My oldest sister, Harriet, came by yesterday for a few minutes and during her visit she told me that she was reading Deathly Hallows, but I knew that she had not read Half-blood Prince and I...basically scolded her. Haha, I did it very jokingly and histrionically though and basically told her that these two books are more connected than any others in the series and that the information in the Half-blood Prince is vital.

I can see how Deathly Hallows would be boring to someone who could not see the connection in all of the stories. If you look at the seventh book by itself, it is just a story to be enjoyed or not enjoyed. But if you look at the seventh book while simultaneously attempting to grasp the hugeness that is everyone's life story in the Harry Potter realm, it is quite overwhelming, and for this reason, awesome.

Alright, I suppose I should go wake up Ricky now since we were sort of planning going to Gainesville today. I feel uncomfortable doing anything in the house when Debbie is here, possibly because I know that she will be leaving soon (at around noon) and that when she is gone, I am able to do whatever I want. I can eat without worrying if the food I will be eating is mine. I can go get bleach or toilet paper or tape or an envelope without asking. I can play music without wondering if it is audible in the living room. I can watch what I want to on TV. I can go outside without being asked why. I can bring Baby in without being told it is a nice day outside and that that is where he should stay.

I think I would like some cake.

EDIT: Oh my crap! And I never mentioned! Remember the earrings I mentioned in this post? My Secret Craftster made them for me! She (or he) is so fucking cool! I have been wearing them ever since I got them, which was a few days ago...except now...I only have one. They were sort of loose, so when I went to touch my them (as I kept doing) and only felt one, I went insane with worry. I am still insane with worry. I have no idea where the other one is. We just got back from my uncle Mike's in St. Pete, so maybe it fell out there? Oh, I can find it...

I just got off of the phone with Kelsey and we had been talking for almost an hour, which is sort of insane because I do not even remember that amount of time passing. It is cool that I can talk to Kelsey. I think that Angel thinks that Kelsey has replaced Angel, or at least she thought that Sevryn had replaced Angel, which was a completely ridiculous theory seeing as I only saw Sevryn once or not at all in a day. Now in the summer, I never talk to her at all. She is just kind of giggly and entertaining, and she seems to be the type of person to be who you want her to be at the time, and most people want her to be giggly, lesbian-ish, and cute. And she is mostly nervous. The fact reminds me of Crisco.

It is 3:33pm, make a wish! Oh, never mind, the time just changed. Bugger, my wish shall never come true now.

Well, I have many things to send out tomorrow. It is very strange how I should be having a flow of money, but really I have a severe lack of it, and I make up for this lack with Ricky, who also has a severe lack. The cycle is not pretty. I want a job! Maybe I should actually try getting one, instead of waiting for it to come out and bite me. I cannot even seem to handle my few online classes and swaps and crochet services without being behind. Very behind. I have many things to send out tomorrow, that I do not have the money for.

Good news is that I just got back from uncle Mike's, which is always nice. It was Hannah's My Little Pony birthday party, which was mostly awkward, especially when it got to the bowling part. I bowled horribly, even with the bumpers on the sides. However, near the end I got tired of being scared of looking stupid, so I just started doing so, and I kept getting strikes! I should look stupid from now on. Stupid equals success! Maybe Dustin will consent to a bowling outing with me and Andrew? And perhaps some others. They are both mostly nervous though, so it would no doubt be a very odd experience. Maybe I will just ask Kelsey. We could go bowling and make fools of ourselves without even bothering to cover it up any, and, in theory, this would make us amazing bowlers!

Actually, the good news was that, on the way back from St. Pete where my uncle Mike and cousin Hannah live, we stopped at Dollar General and I got a pair of scissors. Hurrah! I am so happy, because they are sharp and new and only cost a dollar, so I cannot be asked to feel guilty about them.

Other good news, you ask? Well, I am very near to finishing Deathly Hallows--and have had no spoilers aimed at me by the Interweb! For this, I am grateful. I read muchly on the way to and fro St. Pete. It is very intense and I like it so much, I think I might burst, though it really does just make me feel like my eleven-year-old self again, wishing that Hogwarts was real and that I lived in London. Of course, I wish to live in London for entirely other reasons, but there you have it.

I am going to call New College about tours. I should probably get started on this college- and scholarship-searching business. It seems that all of my fellow students are doing as much as I am, yet my family is constantly prodding at me, telling me it is going to be too late very soon. I think they are all just scared that I will end up like Harriet and Jessica, which I will not. Besides, do they not see that looking at my like I am some disappointment (Debbie) does not exactly help? (I have developed a reasoning as to why Debbie began thinking of me the way that she did (which then made it easier for her to think of me the way she does now, because I screwed up a lot in ways that she completely misunderstood and I feel that I did not really screw up at all--at least, this is what I hope to convince myself of): she got me confused with Harriet and Jessica. See, Jessica lied and lies a lot, we all know this. But whenever Harriet lied, she was not as easily caught, and she would not fess up either. Instead, all three of us were punished. Debbie kept yelling at me, along with Jessica and Harriet, how she had never ever lied to us and how we were such liars, and I was mostly just confused. So when Harriet fessed up, I thought Harriet just did it so that we did not have to be punished anymore, I still do not know if she was the one who made the dent in the door. I thought it was Daddy, with his shoe, when he kicked it. Anyway, so I do not think Debbie ever differentiated between us three. It was always, "David's girls." And I was confused at their wedding, Debbie and Daddy's. She tells everyone that I cried that day because I hated the idea of her marrying my dad, but there was so much fuss about everything, and when I get nervous, I cry uncontrollably and start hiccuping and it gets hard to breath, so I was not allowed to be on the stage with Jessica and Harriet during the ceremony, which I did not really care because I had no idea why exactly they were on the stage. And I murmur, and she yells at me because she thinks I am muttering under my breath at her, but really I can hear myself perfectly fine. I do not murmur at anyone else except for her. Maybe I am scared of her. Though when Joe, Harriet's old boyfriend, mentioned that she intimidated him, she fulfilled his assumptions by yelling on and on about him in a not-so-nice way. Which, no, he was not nice, but at that moment he had not proven it yet. And I was more confused when Debbie told me that sex and blow jobs were so disgusting, even though she did not say those words. She just told me, "Those are the things they pee out of!" and I had no idea what she was talking about. This was about the time when people were all in a hub-bub about teenagers giving and receiving blow jobs in high school bathrooms, something I was pretty much oblivious to and even if I had known, would not really care about. She has this thing, where everyone is the same. She seems to think that we will all make the same decisions when face with certain situations, and cannot fathom otherwise. It is sort of disappointing, saddening, hopeless. But I suppose that is how she thinks of me, as well, disappointing, saddening, hopeless.

And then I wonder, so what if I do prove myself? Years from now, when I am a successful whatsit, will she merely look back and reminisce about what a rude and arrogant, selfish and normal-teenager-like adolescent I was? Will she not see that I have and the same mind the whole time? But maybe I will never be successful. And if I am, I wonder if anyone will be alive to see it besides Angel and Kelsey and Ricky? Because I do not care to impress them. They do not need me to impress them. And I wonder if that creates tension, if I am ever better something than they are, or vice versa? I wonder that a lot of Angel. For a long time, before she met Derek, she has not seemed as close to me as I had once thought she was. She confided to me, and we were close in that way. But when it came to the average hanging out with each other, she seemed to disapprove of a lot of things and I did without my knowledge, just because she misunderstood, and she never talked to me about them. Kind of like Debbie. People just need to communicate.

In other news, I really love what you have to do to enter the Ravenclaw commonroom.

You can barely see them, but there they are: Luna's radish earrings! I heard that she actually made them, which makes me very happy. I wish I knew how to work with wire and seed beads. Maybe I should learn. Do people learn? Or do they just pick it up? Ricky's dad tells me that they have lots of crafty bits for needlepoint and beading that he would like to give to me once he has found it, so I am excited.

Someone on Craftster made them for their very lucky friend:



There's been some more Luna-ness going around as well on the crochet boards, because of her cardigan (which I don't really care for) and her scarf (made by cynalune, inspired by Luna):



Alright, that's it for today.

EDIT:

Which Hogwarts house will you be sorted into?

Your in-depth results are:
Ravenclaw - 13
Gryffindor - 12
Hufflepuff - 11
Slytherin - 9